Incoming freshman earns full ride scholarship from parents

Acceptance letters have been distributed by the University of Wisconsin and students are now anxiously planning how they will be affording schooling in the fall. One incoming freshman has been lucky enough to receive the Patty and Allen Smith Scholarship for children of Patty and Allen Smith. This scholarship includes tuition for all four years, food and board, and a little bit of fun money if the recipient makes an effort to call home every now and then.

“I’m so honored to have received this award. I honestly can’t wait to take it for granted by getting a philosophy degree and then moving to LA to be an actor once I graduate. You could say my education is really important to me. You’d be wrong of course, but you could definitely say those words.” Kelsie Smith, the winner of the award said.

There are several qualifications that applicants for this award must meet. They must have a GPA of 4.0 or lower, a significant amount of volunteer hours unloading the dishwasher, a desire to not have a job for the next four years and at one point in their life must have been encased within Patty Smith’s body for about nine months.

This award was given to Jared Smith in 2012 and Sarah Smith in 2010. Jared is currently working as a waiter in Seattle while he waits for the novel he wrote based off his blog to get published. Sarah moved to the mountains immediately after graduation and has not been seen since.

Kelsie’s future plans include complaining fervently on Twitter about how rough it is being a broke college student, then going to Europe for Spring break and moving into The Hub her Sophomore year.